Actions speak louder than words.
Love requires more than empty talk or exalted theology. It requires simple acts and deeds that anyone can see. When a need is seen and means have been given by God to someone to meet that need, action must be taken.
If a brother or sister is without clothing and in need of daily food, and one of you says to them, “Go in peace, be warmed and be filled,” and yet you do not give them what is necessary for their body, what use is that? —James 2:15-16
. . . show yourself an example of those who believe. —1 Timothy 4:12
. . . I will show you my faith by my works. —James 2:18
Let no one deceive you with empty words . . . —Ephesians 5:6
I faced the same situation as the woman who wrote about being married to an abuser. I am now divorced and remarried. WHAT A MISTAKE! Trying to solve my loneliness and lack of human companionship was not worth the problems I brought on myself and my children.
First of all, any self-respecting Godly man will not marry a divorced woman, which leaves you to choose from the less-desirable, more worldly type of men who do not understand your desire to spend time with God. Even now I long for those days when I could focus my attention on the Lord once the children were gone to school or bed.
My quiet times are now limited to when my husband is gone to work—Monday through Friday. Of course, God causes all things to work together for good (Romans 8:28), and it is my hope that He will draw my husband to Himself. But there is no guarantee.
Satan will feed you whatever lie it takes to separate you from God. Things like:
- “Go ahead and remarry—God will forgive you anyway. Why should you be alone just because your ex was a loser?”
- “How could a loving God expect you to stay single for the rest of your life?”
- “Look at how much you suffered. God wants you to have a good marriage to make up for what you’ve been through.”
- and so on.
One final note—It took me many years to realize that God hates divorce—not the divorced person (Romans 8:1).
Not everyone who has divorced and remarried is experiencing this difficult a situation, but it does serve to warn those who think they can ignore Scripture and make decisions based on “feelings.”
Regarding your statement “any self-respecting Godly man will not marry a divorced woman,” a godly person will first look for a godly spouse, irrespective of the past. The hallmark trait of the Church Age is the ability, through the Holy Spirit, to put anything and everything in the past and move on to the future.
The good news is always that, in whatever situation we find ourselves, even of our own making, God never gives up on us!
. . . one thing I do: forgetting what lies behind and reaching forward to what lies ahead, I press on . . . —Philippians 3:13-14
. . . forgiving each other, whoever has a complaint against anyone; just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. —Colossians 3:13
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Scripture taken from the New American Standard Bible, copyright The Lockman Foundation 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977. Used by permission.
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