But he who restrains his lips is wise.
Some things are better left unsaid.
Knowing when to talk and when to listen is a virtue Scripture encourages. Our mouths can do great damage with only a few words. And undoing the damage may take a lifetime.
the tongue is a small part of the body, and yet . . . how great a forest is set aflame by such a small fire! —James 3:5
Even a fool, when he keeps silent, is considered wise —Proverbs 17:28a
A fool’s mouth is his ruin —Proverbs 18:7a
The one who opens wide his lips comes to ruin. —Proverbs 13:3b
How do single Christians date? I am 30 years old, never married, and a Christian for just over a year. Since I have spent more time being a human “of” the world rather than being a Christian “in” the world, I have no clue how to go about dating using God’s Word as my structure. Any suggestions?
It could be easily argued that dating, in the way usually practiced today, is practice for divorce. When someone has started and stopped several relationships before marriage, it’s not too difficult to assume that they can apply the same remedy to a marriage.
Some have decided to “court” and not “date.” The theory is that in courtship, your cards are on the table that you are not interested in just dating for a good time. Rather, you are sincerely interested in finding a Godly spouse. In very conservative courtships, there is no kissing, hugging, etc., as those type of things are for your future spouse. Unfortunately, you can also take courting to the extreme and the two people never really get to know each other well enough to make an informed decision as to whether or not they should marry. So balance is the key.
|We think that it is not important whether or not you “date” or “court” but rather “why” and with “whom.” If your attitude is scripturally sound, that you are sincerely seeking a believing (1 Corinthians 9:5) life-mate to love you like Christ loves the Church (Ephesians 5:25) and are praying for God’s leading as you do so (Philippians 4:6), then there should be nothing wrong with meeting people to get to know them as friends. You can share testimonies, Scripture, successes, failures, and aspirations. Then, with the Lord’s leading and with both parties having the same goal in mind, you can begin to work toward marriage.||Do we not have a right to take along a believing wife, even as the rest of the apostles and the brothers of the Lord and Cephas? —1 Corinthians 9:5 |
Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her —Ephesians 5:25 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. —Philippians 4:6
Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. —Philippians 4:6
An aspect of relationship-building that has been far underrated in recent years is the importance of seeking the counsel and involvement of your pastor, family, and Godly friends.
The way of a fool is right in his own eyes,
But a wise man is he who listens to counsel. —Proverbs 12:15
Without consultation, plans are frustrated,
But with many counselors they succeed. —Proverbs 15:22
Often someone on the “outside” has a much clearer view of the “big picture,” and good counsel at the start can often help you avoid a lot of heartache down the road. So be sure you sincerely listen to the counsel of the Godly men and women God has placed around you.
And be aware of where you “look” for a spouse. Remember, you eat the food from the store in which you shop, so the typical “singles” scene is probably not where you want to be spending time (Matthew 6:33).
FYI: One of the clearest and most balanced books on the subject of “Christian dating” that we’ve seen to date is I Kissed Dating Goodbye (Multnomah Publishers Inc.) by Josh Harris.
Compass International, Inc. is a 501(c)3 non-profit, non-denominational ministry. Our mission is to defend the accuracy of the Bible from Genesis 1 to Revelation 22 by providing solid Biblical resources for maturing Christians. For more information on Compass, our eye-opening Bible teaching videos and articles, future Bible conferences and awesome Holyland trips, please visit our web site at www.compass.org or call 208-762-7777 for a catalog.Misc. Information
Good Morning Lord! is sent out every Monday-Friday and is copyrighted by Compass International, Inc. There are approximately 300 studies that rotate each year. Any portion of GML e-mails may be forwarded without permission as long as the contact/subscription information is included.
To subscribe or un-subscribe to Good Morning Lord!, go to www.compass.org homepage and click on the “GOOD MORNING LORD!” logo at the bottom.
Scripture taken from the New American Standard Bible, copyright The Lockman Foundation 1960, 1962, 1963, 1968, 1971, 1972, 1973, 1975, 1977. Used by permission.
Answers to questions in GML are intended to be supplementary and in the spirit of Proverbs 11:14, 15:22, and 26:26, which calls for believers to seek counsel from more than one person. Therefore, it is not recommended that any decision be based solely on GML’s answer, but rather it be considered one of several counselors when determining a course of action.Compass International, Inc. www.compass.org